It takes a lot to make me angry. Case in point…
I had Time-Warner cable forever. I kept it because I was too lazy and traumatized by them to deal with changing it. I didn’t love it, but I didn’t hate it. They rarely answered the phone, were usually rude, but so is everyone, so I folded. Then, late this summer, they got in a fight with CBS and SHOWTIME. The first week I thought, “Oh, well this sucks. How am I supposed to watch Dexter?” I love Dexter and was hoping he’d start killing people on other TV shows. OK, I’ll watch it on my iPad. Oh, no, I won’t because they shut iPad access down. I have no idea how they got in my house and did that to my iPad, but in my mind, they did. If that stuff can be done by remote buttons, I’m super scared and would prefer to think a person entered my house and did it manually even though technically that is a burglar.
The fight went on for weeks. I remained calm, thinking they would work it out. Like a child whose parents are fighting I stayed out of the fray, hoped for a nice chicken pot pie dinner where all went back to normal and we all acted like nothing happened. They finally resolved the fight after several more weeks and then I got angry. I thought, “That was just uncalled for. If they did it once, they can do it again.” As always, I’m never the quickest to react, but finally I did. I called Direct TV. My friends that have it love it and I also wanted all the football games. What could go wrong here? Well, nothing, so it seemed. They came over, installed the thing on the roof and presto, I had all my dream channels. I read what channels were available aside from the basics and high priced movie channels and saw my two favorite channels—Discovery ID (lots of murder) and The Weather Channel were listed. Perfect. Life will be perfect now because with weather and murders, I’m never unhappy.
A couple weeks ago, I turned on the Weather Channel because I was flying to the east coast and wanted to see what I was flying into. The screen was black and it said, “The Weather Channel is no longer available. Please tune into Weather Nation.” OMG. Did my TV weather pals get attacked and I didn’t read about it? What about Jim Cantore? Surely that would have been on Twitter. What does this mean, “no longer available?” Are they hurt? Did they all quit? I called my friend with cable. No, my TV weather pals were alive and fine and the Weather Channel is most definitely available. He still had it. Direct TV couldn’t come to an agreement with them. I don’t care what the problem is because there’s nothing I can do about it so I don’t want to hear whose fault it is. I mean, unless it’s like a matter of a $500 difference, then I’d be glad to chip in. And no, I won’t blame The Weather Channel because I didn’t make an agreement with them. I made it with Direct TV.
I tweeted that I was outraged. Ok, that’s a bit of an overstatement for humor’s sake, but I really was pissed. I LOVE THE WEATHER CHANNEL. If I understood any science AT ALL, I’d have been a behind the camera, weird, weather nerd lady. Nothing fascinates me more than an incoming hurricane or anything to do tornadic activity. Yeah, I just threw that out there. Awesome word, tornadic. But alas, not all dreams can come true and we should stop telling children they do. I’d also like to be an FBI profiler but that too involves science so again, dream crushed, move on. I’ll have to live vicariously through others. I’m ok with that. I had a lot of people tweet me back in agreement with loving The Weather Channel and a lot making fun of my love of The Weather Channel.
I am exhausted from explaining to people why I love The Weather Channel. I just do. I love that Jim Cantore will stand in the middle of a hurricane. That’s actual ‘reality TV’ and probably the only real ‘reality TV.’ He doesn’t have hair or makeup. No script. No wardrobe because he’s usually in a poncho. It’s just live and whatever happens, happens. Maybe he’ll get smacked by a flying refrigerator, maybe he won’t. Here’s a great sample of what you are missing if you think this is all lame.
Jesus. He’s more of a superhero than I thought. Catlike reflexes, quickly addressed it and bam, move on. I’ll let that clip do the talking. I could ramble on about seeing reporters get hit with flying objects, that old guy who reads the maps and never leaves his desk, the waves that have swallowed reporters whole and so on but I think that clip says enough.
So, I was at the Tonight Show doing a show and was bored backstage waiting, so I checked my Twitter feed. I was shocked the @theweatherchannel tweeted me back. I didn’t write my tweet in the hopes they would, I just felt that way. And it wasn’t just a programmed thank you tweet. It was really them. I really haven’t been that excited since I got an Irish setter puppy for Christmas in 5th grade. OMG. My TV friends are real. Holy crap. I was supposed to go on stage and somehow had to corral my excitement and answer them later. I’ve been on a million TV shows, met famous people and all that, but I usually don’t care either way and certainly don’t get like a 13-year-old who just got a tweet from One Direction.
I finished the show and again checked my feed. A bunch of the guys from the weather channel tweeted thanks for support AND did this:
What other channel ON earth would do that? So awesome. Proving my love of them and their channel to be on point and real. Then, @directtv tweeted me. Clearly a standard reply to everyone who complained. They said, “We understand it can be disappointing to lose your favorite channel. Why don’t you try @weathernation.”
I tweeted back, “No. Because I didn’t agree to @weathernation. Why don’t you try me paying you in candy? No, because you didn’t agree to that.” You can’t just change the agreement mid-deal. So, when the bill comes, I’m sending them candy corn. The exact amount of pieces the bill adds up to. They did not respond to that tweet because I’m sure no human tweeted their initial response. And, btw, I didn’t “lose” The Weather Channel. You, DirectTV, refused to pay them. I don’t care what it costs, that’s the deal you offered me.
For the record, I did try @weathernation. It’s great if you don’t have Lunesta. Boring maps, weird bad background music and no action. Perfect for a nap or when a nervous breakdown starts. And that’s why I’m sure it’s cheaper. You get what you pay for. Jim Cantore isn’t free. And he shouldn’t be. He has crazy people running at him while he’s trying to work. You try and work at your desk with that going on. Not easy. Last night, there was a huge ice storm in Atlanta. They mayor and governor are actually saying they didn’t get enough warning and didn’t realize how bad it would be. I’m assuming they also must have DirectTV. And they really have no excuse because The Weather Channel is based in ATLANTA. They could’ve walked over and asked them what was going to happen.
So, now I must decide who to switch to. Does anyone have strong feelings either way about DISHTV? It’s the only one I haven’t tried. I also will be going to Atlanta sometime this year to tour The Weather Channel. Maybe they’ll let me be an unpaid intern who lives there and then I won’t have to make any decisions except how to get food and beer money.